There is something
incredibly rewarding about enjoying a daily donut with a cup of coffee. It’s a
cheap fix and for two dollars, that perfect combination of caffeine, sugar, and
carbs will hit my blood stream, and send me buzzing right into the
afternoon.
For another hour
or two, my compulsion to find solace in food is curbed. Maybe.
When I give into these cravings, it’s as if a
switch gets flipped, I go into “fuck it mode” and all bets are off for the day.
There’s nothing quite like stress eating to
throw a wrench in my nutrition game, especially when I can’t exercise due to
illness or injury. I can only describe stress eating as if it has been some
kind of possession. It can manifest in in various ways for different people but
for me it tends to be a blatant disregard for all that is logical and rational
when it comes to my health.
So, do you know why this happens? Because it does work. It gets the job
done. It makes me feel better, albeit fleetingly, but I anticipate that.
This response is
dictated by the reward zone in my brain that, upon ingestion of said favorite
treat, will trigger the release of the chemical dopamine. This neurotransmitter
known as one of the ‘happy chemicals’ is associated with feelings of pleasure,
and serves to perpetuate the cycle, reinforcing my addiction.
The rational side
of me understands that satisfying every whim I have to satiate these cravings
has a directly negative effect on my overall well-being: my blood pressure
creeps back up, I get tired more easily, my gastritis flares up, and it becomes
increasingly evident that I am slipping back into insulin resistance.
How far down the
rabbit hole I go depends on how long I choose to stay in denial. It’s time to
practice a more healing diet that will focus on reducing on my body’s
inflammation and nurturing my gastro intestinal track.
I sit
at my computer to begin purging this feeling through words, and I am brought
back to my own rallying cry. “I will not quit.” And I remember to breathe.
Coming back to the
breath is a huge theme throughout any yoga practice. Sometimes, when I feel
like this, yoga can be my only tether to a better reality. It breaks me out of
this negative thought loop just long enough to start healing again. For me practicing
yoga is practicing wellness, and the more regularly I practice yoga the more I
find myself inclined to keep in line with healthier lifestyle choices.
So, after many
years of experiencing this cycle of binge/ depression/ binge/ depression on
repeat, I have put together a wellness ritual surrounding my yoga practice,
designed to pull me out of this unhealthy behavioral pattern.
The more I
practice wellness, the easier it is to fend off my self-destructive tendencies.
One day I hope to hit a stride in this lifestyle, and never go back. Until
then, all I can do is work towards that vision that keeps calling to me. The
best version of myself.
The ritual: Step 1
The anticipation
of my yoga practice, will actually trigger my memory reminding me that I want to
drink my mushroom-turmeric tea. I try
and take this tea almost every day as well as a vitamin D supplement because my
research has lead me to believe that they are strong tools for healing the
pre-caner in my cervix. Since I have been following this regimen my
precancerous cells have in fact healed by one entire standard.
I squeeze a dropper full of maitaki extract
along with a full dropper of liquid turmeric into a mug of hot or cold water.
The maitaki is an immunity builder, and the turmeric is a powerful
anti-inflammatory. I top all this off with an extra glass of water, and I
imagine this goodness fighting for me as it goes to work circulating during my
yoga practice.
Step 2
At least a half an
hour before my pre-yoga snack I also try to get some probiotics in me because I
want to start re- building my inner flora so that my digestive track may begin
running more effectively and efficiently. Scientists are discovering more and
more about how the bacteria in our gut can affect our general outlook on life
and can play a major role in healing not only anxiety and depression, but
migraines as well. I get migraines too, so all the more reason for me to focus
on cultivating a healthy G.I.
Some experts claim that the bad bacteria will even
hijack your cravings and cause you to want more of what is good for them I.E.
that craving for my beloved doughnut. As it turns out, is just feeding the
cycle, literally.
Step 3
Prebiotics are
subsequently what we already think of as healthy foods: fresh fruits, veggies,
and leafy greens. So I eat a healthy snack of prebiotics to support my
probiotics about an hour before my yoga practice. It’s always something light:
a fresh juice with a raw nutrient dense energy ball, you know, the kind you might
get at a health food store. Or some other nutritious snack, like a green smoothie,
or a salad, or maybe some almond butter, with a couple of sticks of carrots and
celery or a banana. I want to make sure
I get some kind of raw fiber in me at this point. Something that will sustain
me through an hour of asana practice.
Step 4
Yoga. Even when I
am sick or injured there is always a way to modify my practice. There are a
diverse range of yoga styles to accommodate different situations and particular
needs. Yoga is so versatile and it is so much more than asana, there are eight
whole limbs to explore. But more on that later. The key here is consistency. Showing
up on the mat is more than half the battle.
This is all part
of an ever evolving process that is one person’s wellness. My journey. Soon I
will be a certified yoga teacher, and I want to get into better health also so
that I may hold a safe space for my students and be encouragement to them as
they navigate their own way. I want to walk the walk so to speak, and be a
clear example of how yoga’s ripple effect can transform one person’s entire
experience.
Love,
Jess
Note: I am not a
doctor, and none of this is medical advice. It is only the story of my experience.
