My First Day of Yoga Teacher Training

                                                                         
  

Arranging my life around yoga teacher training was surprisingly simple. I had mentioned my goal to attend a teacher training this year during the interview with Trader Joes, so when the time came, my managers could not have been more accommodating.

Me: The first day of teacher training.

Nothing could put a damper on my spirits; I felt like a child before Christmas, impatient with anticipatory excitement. My teacher training was to be my reward at the end of the longest eight day work week of my life.

I woke up that morning energized, but still lavishly granted myself a few extra hours in bed.  Teacher training was not until six p.m. and I was determined to have a restful day.  When I finally got up around ten, I fixed myself my very favorite breakfast: A scrambled egg quesadilla, with Havarti cheese, sour cream, avocado, tapatillo, and a cup of coffee. I cuddled with my kitty as I watched a show, and then I turned on my computer to check the latest stats on my fundraiser.

Two hundred and fifty three people had been to my site that day, but not a single donation within the past four days. I was a bit perplexed, so I took another hard look at my fundraiser, and I was finally I was able to look at my story with an objective eye. I noticed, that even though I had been honest about the benefits I had received from yoga, the whole page looked pretty generic. Almost cliché. So I deleted everything I had written, and started from scratch. My story finally came together in the flow of inspiration I had been waiting for, and I spent a few lovely hours typing away.

 When I finished my story I hadn’t ever been more proud of one of my pieces. It wasn’t perfect, but it was authentically my story, so that’s all that mattered.

When I was finished with my story, it was two p.m. I had been sitting on my couch for about four hours, and I figured it was time to do some light cleaning.

As I was making the bed, my vision board caught my eye, and I became overwhelmed with gratitude. I made my way over to the dresser where it was displayed, and just sat on the edge of the bed marveling at it for a while.

 I recalled the night I had put it together at Hua’s house on the winter solstice. I remembered the excitement, feeling those first moments of wonder and possibility capture me while cutting up the magazines and gluing them to the poster board. I just had to stop and acknowledge how far I’ve come.

Today was the day, the fruit from my intention that had been planted in the darkness of the winter solstice. I wept.

 Tears of gratitude overflowing from my heart, I offered my tears as give aways to my spirit family, thanking them for their protection, and guidance. I humbly prayed to Spirit to protect me, and to ensure my physical safety through this process. I visualized my body strong and undamaged, infused with golden light. I saw all of my supporters, spirit and human; they were standing behind me, holding me up, giving me strength and I was filled with pure love. And I allowed myself to sit with that love until my tears subsided. What a fabulous day already.

Recovering from that powerful experience, I got into the shower. I stood there, letting the hot water run down my body, clutching my gratitude. I leaned my neck back, preparing to wash my hair, and that’s when I felt a crunch. A jolt of electricity ran down my left arm. “Oh shit.”  I’ve felt that before, and continued to open the shampoo bottle, somewhat in disbelief, squeezing the shampoo into my left palm, I reached up to my head and ZAP!

“UUHHgg,” the audible sound of discomfort escaped my lips. “No!” I pleaded, “This can’t be happening!! Not today. No. no, no, no, no, no.” I began to test my range of motion and ZAP, down my left arm again. “What the holy Fuck!? Why!?” I petitioned the universe bewildered. Was this some kind of karmic joke? How could this be happening right now!?

  My heart rate began to pick up speed as my thoughts began to whirl. “Oh my god” I thought, I remembered the last time I had felt the effects of a pinched nerve, when the other side went out, it took a full eight weeks to recover “Could this mean, no teacher training?”  I was falling into a panic attack.

I took a deep breath. “Breath” I reminded myself “This ain’t your first rodeo.”

 Brain storming for anything I could do, I began foam rolling my upper back, hoping that whatever went out might pop back into place. Rolling just seemed to aggravate it. “Ice.”  I spoke the word, as it came to mind. Ice will help the inflammation I recalled. I didn’t have ibuprophen, but I had some turmeric, which has helped me with migraines in the past. I took some, and iced my neck and shoulders, and tried to do some breathing to clear my mind.

It was three o’clock and orientation was not until six. I realized that I had enough time to see my chiropractor whose office is about twenty minutes away. I made the phone call, cleared my day, and was on the road in about fifteen minutes. Dr. Mike put me back together, and I asked him if it was going to take  another eight weeks  to heal this time, and he told me that it was good that I got to him so soon because the longer a nerve is being pinched, the longer it takes to heal. It was also a good thing that we weren’t going to be doing any postures on our first day, and it was at that point I felt gratitude that my neck hadn’t gone out during asana practice that weekend. I would not have been able to get to Dr. Mike, and the whole situation could have been much worse.

I got to orientation that day still feeling a little unsure and sorry for myself. As we went through our personal introductions, I was listening to people’s stories. One person was crippled for five years. He had to re-learn how to walk. Another has an aggressive auto immune disorder where her body attacks her organs. And another had been paralyzed on one side of her body and is still working around those limitations. It all really put my experience into perspective. I remembered why I wanted this. I want to help people with limitations, starting with myself.

*If you would like to support my yoga teacher training journey, check out my fundraising page: www.gofundme.com/yoga4all  I still have a long way to go to be able to pay for this yoga education. Every dollar is appreciated. Lets make this happen!